You guys, one of the many reasons I love the holidays is the get together factor…seeing friends we haven’t seen in a while because, well, life. So last night we did just that, got together with our dear friends to celebrate for a few reasons and it was just like old times from back when we all lived in the same neighborhood and we would hang out in each other’s apartments with our kids running around until it was time to put them to bed. Except last night was adults only and we went to a play (that my great friend is so brilliant in) and to dinner afterward. Anyway….the ladies and I exchanged our Christmas gifts because we probably won’t all be together again before the actual holiday and while we are all good gift givers, one friend out did herself by giving us all matching mugs that say “World’s Okayest Mom” which we all got a chuckle out of and immediately wanted to use! (see photo attached to this blog post)
The mug got me thinking last night while I was laying in bed replaying the evening’s jokes and stories and I decided that it’s message is completely true and I’m totally okay with being an okayest mom, and it’s even better that we’re all okay with it too. I love that there’s no competition on child rearing with this bunch of women who have been in my circle for the last 8 years. We all have different neuroses about our kids and while we can kid and joke with one another about them, you better believe that if anything ever turns serious we all jump in to offer our help and support. I love that we’re all raising good, independent kids with different interests yet when they come together they find common ground. I love that even though some of us have moved to different towns, we all make the effort to keep our friendships moving forward.
Being an okayest mom for me means we’re doing the best we can with what we have. Some snippets of conversations about our kids from around the table at dinner last night:
“can you believe our kid was once the kid who wouldn’t get up to participate in any activity at all and now she’s the fastest kid on the track team? I mean, we don’t promote it at all because we don’t want to encourage organized sports on the weekends because we like to have family time and we’re a little lazy” – EPIC!! (and I’m a little jealous of this to be honest!)
“we took the kids to see Santa at the mall and the girls were screaming crying on his lap. The elves were mortified that we told them to take the picture without trying to calm them down! I told them we have enough pictures of them smiling, just take the damn picture already!” – THE. BEST.
“can you believe this kid keeps texting me to ask if they can watch The Hunger Games? I told them all NO when we left the house and in a text! How come no one listens!!” – (thank God this happens outside of my house too!)
That stuff make me feel great because it solidifies the fact that we are all in it together. We all have kids that have impressed us with the unexpected, kids who have tantrumed out at inopportune times and kids who try to push the envelope. It makes us normal. And if that’s what being the okayest is, then I’ll take it. I’ll take our happy, smiling (most of the time), relaxed kids any day of the week. It’s hard enough being a parent, having to be perfect and exceptional at it is exhausting. We pick our battles, and the quicker we learn which ones to pick – the better!
That’s why I do this job – to help other parents realize that it’s okay to be you. It’s okay to be really good at one thing and crappy at another. It’s okay to love your children with your whole heart and soul and want to kick their asses at the same time. It’s okay to be the okayest because really, that’s what we all are. And if you’re as lucky as I am to have a circle of friends along the likes of the ones I do, then you’re ahead of the game because they will get you through anything. Congrats on being the okayest because it really is the best.