What a spectacular weekend you guys! The weather was unbelievable for this time of year, the sun was out, the temps were up, hell, my kids even took a dip in our friend’s very heated pool on Saturday…in New Jersey. We tried a new place for burgers in Brooklyn, Umami Burger, if you live in the metro NY area, go to one of their places, I think there are 2, it was delish!! (maple bacon fries, need I say more??) And, to top it off, we got to spend some time with a good friend of ours who is healing from surgery and is doing better every day.
What wasn’t so spectacular was the whining and arguing among my children. Even though there is a 6 year age difference between them, it’s starting…the “he touched my toy” or “get off of me!” or any other combination that will send a parent into a complete tizzy forcing their children to sit on opposite sides of the couch/car/room. Now I really can’t complain all that much, for the most part, they get along really well but now that the little one realizes he can voice an opinion well, let’s just say, nothing will ever be the same again. At one point, I was hiding in the bathroom to get 5 minutes of peace, reminiscing about the lazy Sunday’s we used to have pre-kids.
Flash back to when the weekends were made up of sleeping late, watching the morning news shows, and reading the NY Times till noon? Going to brunch at 2 and dinner at 9? Maybe running errands and maybe not. Having sex whenever the mood would strike. Hanging out with friends, having cocktails and conversation without interruption…I remember those days fondly. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want them back but sometimes I just want one day of that. I want no arguing, no complaining, no whining! I want contentment, serenity, and laughter. My mother gets aggravated when she asks me if I can imagine my life without my boys and I answer yes, yes I can. I can because I had a life before they came along…a good one. I can’t imagine my life without them in it going forward but I sure do know what it was like before they got here. This may sound like I’m complaining about them and I’m not (not really), I’m just expressing what other parents think but sometimes won’t say out loud because they feel like they can’t. Listen, I love my children more than I could ever possibly imagine. They make me laugh the hardest, smile the biggest and hug the longest. They also make me want to scream sometimes! (And I do).
Fast forward to the present, our weekends consist of getting up early (before 9), and running around like crazies from soccer to birthday parties, park dates to ski lessons (depending on the time of year), and so forth. It never ends and I never want it to. I just want a to find a happy medium. A date night here, a day of hooky there, that little reprieve before chaos ensues again. There’s nothing wrong with wanting a few minutes to yourself or with your partner without the kids, in fact, it’s good if you do…it means you still like each other. I encourage alone time, it’s good for everyone. It makes your family appreciate you more for all you do for them and it makes you appreciate them for…well…for being them. And now I’ll go use some of my alone time taking a kickboxing class…because I’m crazy.